You all know the type I'm talking about, "I love my husband SO much, he did A, B, and C for me today" or even pictures via Instagram, "Out on a hot date with my awesome husband", etc. As a viewer of such irritating posts, I used to feel jealousy or whatever that my spouse didn't do stuff for me, but then I realize that there's a root to those posts: the validation, bragging, covering up and impersonal.
The quest for validation IS what social media has become. People post pictures and status' to get recognition from their peers. When they say stuff like how much they love their husband, they are looking for that attention to make them feel like, "Oh, so-and-so said they wished their husband was as great as mine. I really am lucky." Gag me now, if you need to validate your relationship and your marriage, go to the source. Go to your spouse and tell them, spend time with them instead of being online.
There is a fine line between being grateful and bragging. This line is crossed everyday sometimes multiple times online. Why do we feel that need to display what's great about our life and deny the bad? That image-focused world won't get us anywhere better. The first brag creates a cycle and more posts and more pictures and then no one cares anyway and you get blocked. Real life isn't perfect, so why display perfection? Why shove pictures of your "wonderful" life into everyone's face? Why not step back and see it for what it is? Flawed and beautiful; a combination that should be reveled in and not just talked about to the world.
My next thought about these braggers is that perhaps they are trying to cover up really awful stuff. The other day, I was listening to morning talk show and they were discussing social media and how people put on this facade for the world to see online, when real life is so much worse/better. My coworker shared with me a story that one of her friends on Facebook always says how much she loves her husband; when in real life her husband cheated on her and was a complete douche bag, but she puts on this face for social media so that everything seems okay. Again, if stuff isn't really okay and you are trying to lie to yourself online. Turn off the computer and go see a relationship therapist or have a real conversation with your spouse/significant other.
I don't like to post about how great my husband is because the internet is not the place. My relationship with him is personal. It's between him and me. That's it. If I love him and I'm grateful he did something for me. I tell him in person or I do something special to show my gratitude. Our relationship is precious and the internet is a awful, degrading place to put my love for show. A relationship is private and what goes on with us: good or bad doesn't belong on the internet. We figure out our problems and we grow; but we don't need to show everyone. We show each other, we tell each other, we love each other.....without social media.
This blog entry was a little rough to sort out my thoughts. I hope it make sense. If this article reduces "I love my husband" facebook status' or one less picture in my feed. I will have succeeded.
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