Best Facebook Day Ever

I often peruse Facebook on breaks and lunch...before, after and during work.  Posts were epic today. I haven't laughed at/with Facebook like in probably 160 days or something.  This picture was posted and I had to share both the pic and the comments. I highlighted my favorites.
Needless to say, I have a tattoo appointment with an artist named Butch on Monday.

Meghann: I'm getting this tattooed tomorrow
Shell Tate: can I get one to match? only with like a bunny instead or something?

Jared B:It's ridiculous how things like this actually exists. I can't comprehend it. 

Meghann: Yes, Michelle! Definitely! And Jared- You can't comprehend how beautiful it is?

Jared B: Sure

Meghann: Hahahaha it really is breathtaking. I think I'll call it... A CatiCorn

Jared B: Unipussy

Shell Tate Jared, that's the best comment ever!

Madeline: Tramp stamp? that will def look good.

Meghann:I was thinking that- or maybe on my chest
Haven: are you serious???

Meghann: Only if Michelle does it with me. I've always wanted a mystical creature to grace my body.  HAHAHAHAAAA
Shell Tate lol...I'll meet you there, when was the appt. with Butch (aka the tattoo artist) again?

Kim: Really were at 

Meghann: Maybe like, 6:00? Does that sound good? We gotta prepare up for the awesomeness


Spinning Dream

"If this is what it takes, just to lie with my mistakes."

"Your afraid to find out all this hope you had sent into the sky, by now had crashed"



My days have an odd habit of mixing together lately. Evenings spent in the darkened video room with monitors and buttons and my days spent sleeping. It's monotonous, boring and kind of lonely.  If you don't count text messages and a quick 'hello' at work, I don't interact with people. 
I crave attention and some sort of recognition for work and other things I do in life. I'm restless. On nights when I sit in this non-ergonomic chair in front of monitors, I think of dreams and goals. I think of the church and my progression. That's when I feel like life is draining out of me. 
I just rediscovered Pandora Radio online again. Oh glorious Pandora! With my perfect radio station in place: an odd mixture of Pearl Jam, Postal Service and Relient K.  My work becomes more like a dream. 
With my eyes pinched tight and my arms folded loosely in my lap, I imagine I'm somewhere else and the smooth rhythms and steady voices bring me back from my electrical horror, into something more lucid and beautiful.


My Batman

Do you remember this?

  I don't think I'll ever forget Saturday mornings with tall, dark and handsome Batman. I can still see "midget Michelle" checking the clock for the time and barreling onto the couch.  
  There was something glittery about the whole combination: my 80's style pajamas, mussed up hair, a soft blanket on the couch and of course the Dark Knight.
  He and I shared something special in those early mornings. The Bat Signal clearly spoke to me across animation circuits and television broadcasting.  Those over-rated commercials about the "Easy Bake Oven" or Barbie Dreamhouse was child-play when I could learning about fighting crime, justice and real heroes.
  While other heroes had their stupid puns (winy Spiderman) or ridiculous powers (mumbling Superman), Batman didn't have the awkward "S" tattooed to his chest nor did he shoot nasty webs out of his wrists. His dark cloak and smirk gave hint to a certain sophistication and class. He used his perfectly normal self (pimped out by some sweet gadgets) and showed villains of Gotham City and everyone else in the world how justice was done--by real people.
  Now that I'm older I see a lot of value in Batman. I wrote an English paper on him and like any true obsessive nerd, I could debate Batman subjects with the best of them. I just got the whole Batman: The Animated Series on DVD and I'm so excited to reacquaint myself with true love--ahem--I mean justice and heroic actions of my childhood.  Here's to Batman--a real hero and not just some fool wearing a bright cape and silly boots. I think I could be Batman....


Drowning in Matlock

You would know him, if you saw him.  He's standing on the stairs wearing a periwinkle blue trench-coat and a smirk.  The slight wrinkles on his face and high water slacks remind me of kind grandfathers that smile at me on Trax.  His mussed up tie and fluffy white cap of hair can not overshadow the beady eyes that are digging at me through the monitors.
I have a love/hate relationship with Matlock. The man both terrifies and intrigues me. Luckily, I was able to avoid his piercing looks and smug smiles through my childhood and most of my adult life--thus far.
Every weekend I see more of Matlock than I ever wanted. It doesn't matter which day it is; Saturday or Sunday night shift, he's there to accuse me in the dark, late nights. 
Some days Matlock reminds me of my dad, with over the top expressions and the cheesest puns/lines known to mankind. I wouldn't be surprised if I found my dad watching him in the basement, "Michelle, it's just education; don't tell.  No one has to know why I'm so funny."
At that point I could roll my eyes and say, "Sure, Dad.  I'll let you stick to your fantasies and imaginary world of humor and awesome-ness that only Matlock and you truly enjoy."
I bet that's true too...Baby Boomers are probably the only ones who enjoy it, that's probably why it still airs in 1960-1970 quality with pinched colors and dulled edges. Or why it airs at 1pm on KJZZ right after a slew of awful Hollywood judge shows.
So every weekend Matlock and I stand off. Well, he stands off and I cower in the corner of the video tape room away from his glaring looks. Maybe if I don't look at the screens, he can't eat any more bits of my soul or laugh at my pathetic fear.  
You win this time, Matlock.


The Bacone, aka Bacon Time Space Continuum Breaker

As my friend Jim Gaffigan would say, "...if you put bits of bacon on a strip of bacon, you could travel in time. It would be a bacon-to-bacon time-space continuum."

Well Jimmy, here's our chance to travel that magical meat time warp: the bacone. Created out of San Francisco and molded by a man with a bright green mohawk and lovely eyes, the bacone is molded to be stuffed with delicious eggs, cheese, gravy and topped with a biscuit.  It is genius.  Someday I want to meet this mohawked man and try his delicious bacone. 

Video Bonuses:
1. Brian Boitano and his crazy, overly flamboyant explanations
2. A green mohawk...not just a mohawk--a spiked mohawk that reminds me of the Statue of Liberty 
3. Bacon with space to actually put more bacon---or breakfast foods if you prefer. 


2010 Grates

It's been real 2010, a real pain....and some awesome things. I was thinking about my 'greats' of 2010.  Some would quickly point out graduation and working for KSL.  Although walking in the Huntsman Center with my cap and gown was priceless and nothing really prepared me for sitting in front of televisions screens for news; I don't mean those kind of 'greats'.  "Grates", my cool slang term for funny things I am grateful for. Here's my list of awesome 'grate' things in my life from 2010: grateful.

1. Public Transportation: so there never is a shortage of bum/crazy stories or visuals like this guy <--------------

2. I work with exactly 4 women, which means the bathroom is pretty much always clean--much different from when I worked at call centers and shared the bathroom with hundreds of women....smelly/dirty women.

 3. To be a Utah Ute, so I can brag and trash talk all my blue-bleeding BYU "friends" about my boys winning 17 to 16  in 2010.

 4. For my marine brother who calls me while driving to go to dinner and often gets distracted instead, sometimes with road rage....and a long slew of curse words.

5. For my cousins, so on Thanksgiving I can build robots with their children instead of having an adult conversation.

 6. My car, Dante, to be the envy of all the town, with all my trashbags and a broken windshield.

7. The word "shenanigans", it always makes me laugh.

 8. A fantastic imagination, so I can always be entertained...even if everyone else doesn't get it.

 9. The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, so I can bear sarcasm and weird actual events along inappropriate lines/jokes with laughter galore...that Scottish man never ceases to make me giggle, with a robot skeleton sidekick (Geoff Peterson) and his random puppetry and impressions. I will love him until the day I die.

10. The gym, so I can use my imagination to kick everyone's trash including slimy ex-boyfriends as well as maintain health.

 11. My apartment handles snow removal so I don't have to, including on our "breezeway" in front of our door and next to my window. Too bad they pick the middle of the night to scrape snow and ice. Yes, I heard you crazy shovelers at 3am, 5am and then 8am.