Adult braces: is there something in my teeth?

It's time for me to grow up....or grow down I suppose.  I'm 25 years old, but now I look 17 and I eat like I'm 80.  It's time that my smile is what it should be. So my question to you...do I have something in my teeth?
It always feels like globs of food are stuck to them--but I do brush like a paranoid freak and flossing took me almost ten minutes last night.
Eating is pretty bad. The assistant kept saying I could eat whatever, just smaller bites or whatever. That's the biggest lie ever. It hurts super bad and to correct my teeth means they don't connect right.  Dirty lies. I'll be eating mashed potatoes and oatmeal for the next 20 months.
These 20 months are going to be awesome.....?


The Scary Elevator

There are four elevators at work.  The only time I take the elevator is to get a soda; so I take it almost every day.  Okay, maybe not that much but sometimes it seems daily.
Three elevators are perfectly normal.  The fourth elevator is wide and a lot taller, it also has weird coverings on the walls.
I'm sure these coverings are to protect the walls when dangerous animals or things with sharp corners needs to go to the 8th floor or something.
The logic for these coverings doesn't matter. I hate getting it it. There are surely demons on the other side, yellow eyes glaring at me from the shiny elevator surface. Or perhaps there is a murder hiding behind the corner and to stab me. (Nevermind the fact, you need to get past security or badge checkpoints).
It would suck to get stabbed in an elevator.  Mostly because I would probably end up haunting it and going up and down the floors in KSL would be a really sucky afterlife.So maybe this time I'll step out of it, take the next one where I can see the killer's eyes. I hope they are blue.


The Coffin House

Shows like "Ghost Hunters" are my favorite. I love visiting places that have drama and spook to them. A few years ago I was really stuck on going to somewhere "haunted".  I googled the crap out of haunted places in my area.
My best friend at the time, Ryan, and his girlfriend wanted to go on an adventure to said haunted places. As we started on this journey; our hearts beating in time the his rusty engine in pure adrenaline; headed for the place mentioned thousands of times through high school and middle school.
A circular building/farm or something that was haunted. I can't recall the tale of murder or death, but the "round house" was terrifying to my classmates as a result of illegal shooting at the building.  With the slightest breeze, the building would echo a terrifying scream-like noise. To our disappointment, the building had been torn down a few years before.
Ryan enthusiastically suggested the "coffin house". He described the building as old and boarded up, conveniently located beside a cemetery and difficult to enter because of a cop who lived nearby.
Ryan, his girlfriend and I ran up the hill and walked beside a green, garbage filled stream.  (I'm pretty sure the stream was almost a solid mass it was so polluted.)
The house has also been torn down, but the "coffins" remained in a half circle around where the house used to sit. 
Kinda like this; scary right?

These square containers couldn't be longer than five feet and they made of thick grey cement--close to four inches thick.  Many of them had decayed on the corners and you could see inside--if your head didn't block all the light.
Ryan starts looking inside one with his flashlight and he starts yelling, "Oh my gosh guys, I think there's something in this one! It looks like something is scratched on the inside! I can't make out the words. Someone must have scratched in it with fingernails or something.
I am a skeptic, because clearly these weren't coffins. I take his flashlight and get on my knees, peering into the dark cement box where a skeleton should be rotting.
At first I see it too. There seemed to be writing and it kind of seemed to shine in the light of the flashlight. Suddenly this skeleton turned into an alien form leaving a message for us.  I shove the flashlight as far as the decaying cement would let me and I see----DUCT TAPE. 
That's right; my idiotic friend confused the grooves in silver, bent duct tape to be writing from an undead creature.



Either my Batman obsession has gone too far or my visual impairment previously discussed is out of control. Or perhaps I work too many late nights and my baby gets up too early.
For whatever reason, when I get off work I see this sign and I think it says "BATMOBILE TRAFFIC ONLY"

Clearly, it does not.   Almost every day I see it and laugh aloud.  I give the sign a nod and drive my black car underneath it. In this world, I drive a Batmobile to work--just your working class hero.


Anniversary Cheating

Yesterday was David and my anniversary.  We went to dinner and a movie....and I tried to leave with another man.
We saw Prometheus, which was fantastic. I had to pee pretty much the whole time, but I couldn't leave. The movie was far too intense and action packed. I figured I would risk it.
After the movie I almost sprinted to the bathroom, leaving Dave meandering behind me--lost in his Ridley Scott coma.  I came out and I see him standing there with his phone.
Almost exactly like this, except he wasn't facing me.

I start walking up beside him so I can grab his hand and then he faces me.  This man was clearly not Dave. His hair was dark and he was wearing horn rimmed glasses. 
A quick spin to avoid an already awkward moment and I see Dave about five feet away looking almost the same.
I'm a generalist when it comes to vision. I have 20/20 vision but I don't use it.  Finding a destination, reacquainting myself with old friends, and finding clothing to wear is very general.  The shirt I want to wear is green (I know it has a woman dancing on it, but I look for green shirts in my closet), my friend has long brown hair, glasses and a slightly crooked nose (I know her eyes are green and she is short, but I look for those things),  the destination I'm going to is next to an Arctic Circle (I look for an Arctic Circle in the vicinity). 
Clearly this has burned me one too many times. Going somewhere next to a McDonald's (do you know how many McDonald's there really are in Utah?). Trying to hold my "husband's" hand just because he was dressed and acting like Dave.  Maybe it's time to utilize that 20/20 vision to the full extent.


Don't Punch Cars

I'm sorry for posting yet another video. True stories are coming. I have to share this gem.  Kid history will change your life.  I laughed, I cried, I remembered my childhood. You will do the same.  Thanks to my coworker for the magic.


Pink Muppets

I am trying to force my childhood on Cameron. I stumbled across this a while ago, it's currently the only piece of my childhood she responds to. I love the "Muppets". Jim Henson=genius.


Reading for the Illiterate

On Nightly News Brian Williams (or whatever his name is) was talking to this kid who was wearing a pin that said he read 50 books in the school year.  He said that adults definitely don't read that many in a year.
I got a little defensive! Back in the day I used to read tons and tons--a new book every week or two. 
So I logged onto goodreads (the only decent way I can track my "to reads" and "reads" so I don't repeat).  I've only read four books this year...working on five.  Half way through the year and I've only read four books. The sad part is that out of the five, I've only enjoyed about half. How pathetic!
Sitting on a squishy couch, curled up with a book and some tunes playing in the background. Instead, there's Cameron crying or a commercial break at work. Wouldn't it be great, if everyone was granted a reading break? Somewhere in the middle of the day, where you can stop and just lose yourself in a story.

Just in case your wondering, I'm working on "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo". I caught wind of the book and all the whispers of the plot. I love a good murder mystery (Dateline/60 Minutes).  When I was a kid, I used to watch them with my mom, to see if I could figure stuff out before they said it. 
Anyways, I went back and forth on reading this book for a month. It sounded good--then I saw the movie--and it scarred me.  I took it off my list-put it back on-took it off-etc.
I put it back on for the last time; maybe the book will be different. Reading something is a lot different than seeing.
I'm loving the book. I feel like Lisbeth has one pale hand around my wrist, dragging me into the mystery. Even though I know what's going to happen, there's something more meaningful to a plot when read.  The feelings are more personable than seeing it on the big screen. Why am I blogging right now? I should read!